The Neji Experience
by SheWolfByakugan
Summary: Neji has just returned to the village from his special training after one year. He hasn't told anyone what the training was for and now there are strange noises coming from his inside his house. The truth is...Neji is...doing things to people. It's up to two curious kunoichi to find out what he's doing in there. HINTED YAOI and HET with no real details. No lemon. Features an OC
1. Neji's Return

_A/N: Hello everyone, Zayla here! This is my second fanfiction. It just popped into my mind and I wrote it out. I have no clue where it came from. The genres are drama and mystery but there are also a few attempts at humor... First and foremost, there will be __**hinted yaoi**__ as well as __**hinted het. **__I repeat, __**HINTED! **__There will be no details or lemon. So if you don't like mentions of yaoi, please don't read this and then flame me because I'll get Sasuke to use his Fireball Jutsu and blow the flame right back in your face. Thank you very much. Also, I feature myself as an OC in this story so when you see the name Zayla that would be me. If you would like to know more about that character then read my other story "Payback: Why You Should Never Prank a Ninja!" It's not all about her but she's a major part of the story. This story is rated T because of the hinted sexual acts and also for cursing. Now we move on from technicalities and onto the actual story. Enjoy! :D_

* * *

It was a beautiful, sunny day in the Hidden Leaf village. There were pure white, puffy clouds scattered across the sky. It wasn't hot at all but just the perfect temperature for a comfortable stroll. There was also a gentle breeze blowing. Izumo and Kotetsu were at their usual spots by the main gate when all of a sudden Izumo punched Kotetsu's arm to wake him up. "What was that for?" Kotetsu asked sleepily as he stretched. "Check it out," Izumo pointed at the group of people walking towards the gate. "It's them. Today must be the day," Izumo said.

By 'them' he meant the Konoha 12 minus Neji. The newest addition to the group, Zayla, was with them as well. They were all coming to wait for Neji who had been gone for a year and was returning today. One day he had randomly said something about special training and leaving the village for one year to complete it. Of course everyone wanted to know what type of training he was talking about but he refused to tell them. He wouldn't even give them a hint. He waited about two weeks after his announcement before he left.

Hinata had arranged a going away party for him. She seemed to like planning parties since she was always the one who volunteered to have them. It was great though. All Neji's friends were there, all of the senseis came, even Lady Tsunade and Shizune had shown up but Tsunade got drunk and tried to have sex with Gaara so Shizune had to take her home before Tsunade could hurt the young Kazekage. She was dragged out the party yelling "Kages are sexy! Kages turn me on! Dear God, yes they do!" and many other innuendoes that scarred everyone there for life. The following day, Neji departed.

Today was one day after the one year mark which is when Neji said he would arrive. The group of shinobi waved and yelled some hello's at the two gate guards before stopping right in the middle of the gate and staring down the path ahead of them, waiting for their friend to come home. After about ten minutes of talking amongst themselves, Kiba thought of something. "Hey, Hinata," he said. "Yes, Kiba," she said as she went over to him. "Why don't you use your Byakugan to see if he's close by," he suggested. "Oh yes. Of course," she replied happily. She walked in front of the group and clasped her hands together with her right index finger pointing straight up. "Byakugan!" She scanned the trees and the path ahead of her and gasped, causing everyone to stop talking. "What is it? Is he close?" Kiba asked excitedly, hoping his best friend was near. "Just look," Hinata said, pointing straight ahead. Everybody followed her finger and could see a person not too far away walking toward them. "Is that him?" Tenten asked just as excitedly as Kiba. "Yes!" Hinata squealed as she and her own best friend, Zayla, jumped up and down before getting a hold of themselves and stopping immediately.

Off in the distance, Neji was walking along with a smile on his face. Using his Byakugan, he had spotted his friends walking up to the gate and he also saw Hinata use her Byakugan to see him. She must've told the others because right after she spotted him, Kiba, Tenten, and Zayla ran up to her then she and Zayla had begun jumping up around. He had missed all of them and couldn't wait to reveal the results of his training. He sped up a bit so he didn't keep them waiting though he was sure they wouldn't mind.

As he neared the gate, Hinata and Zayla ran out to meet him in a group hug. He wrapped an arm around each girl and his smile widened. Once they let go, they made their way over to the rest of the group. Kiba came up to him and they did that thing that guys do when you smack hands like a sort of handshake or something then bring it in for a one armed hug while your hands are still connected in the middle. I don't know what it's called but hopefully you get what they did. The rest of the girls hugged him and the guys gave him an assortment of the hug-handshake thing, pats on the pack, 'welcome home's, high fives, and the ever emotional Lee gave him a tearful hug while shouting things about the return of his youthful teammate. Neji had to bring out a spray bottle labeled "Lee Spray" and squirt Lee a couple of times to make him stop hugging him. It was simply a squirt bottle of water that Tenten had given him a while back since she had tested it out on Lee and it had proved useful. Now they both kept bottles of "Lee Spray" with them wherever they go and had secretly sold a few of them to Sakura.

It was midday so the gang decided to go for some lunch. They went to one of the few restaurants in the village that had tables big enough to seat 13 people. After lunch and Neji being pestered with questions about his training, none of which were answered, everyone separated so that Neji could go home and get some rest. He insisted that he was fine but no one listened so he ended up trudging slowly to his house.

Once he had gotten home, he took a nice, warm, relaxing shower. He had gotten dressed then began cleaning up his neglected house. He lived alone in a two bedroom house located about 60 feet away from the Hyuga mansion. He enjoyed living by himself and also the frequent visits from his friends. It was a win-win situation. He had his privacy and he wasn't sad from being alone because he got many visits from his friends but not too many to the point where it's annoying. Now he was home and everyone had pushed him away and basically _made _him go home. He didn't have to stand for this! He tidied up his house to get rid of most of the dust and then called Kiba to come hang out with him and tell him everything he had missed while away from home.

Soon enough, there was loud knocking on the front door. He knew it had to Kiba. He opened the door and welcomed Kiba headed to the living room with Akamaru trotting behind them. "Would you like something to drink?" Neji offered. "No thanks, man," Kiba replied as he sat down on the couch, Akamaru on the floor next to him. Neji made himself comfortable in the single chair across from the couch. "So, what has been going on in my absence? Fill me in," Neji said. "Well, let me see," Kiba rubbed his imaginary beard as he arranged his thoughts. "OH YEAH! Tsunade tried to rape Gaara again!" he burst out and began laughing. "You're kidding me?" Neji said as he tried to keep a straight face. "No way! It was so hilarious, dude. It happened a couple of months after you left. Shizune had waited a while to tell her what happened at your going away party since Tsunade was so drunk she didn't remember. Apparently, she really does have a thing for Gaara. It wasn't just the alcohol talking that night. Once Shizune told her everything, Tsunade had arranged a fake meeting with Gaara. She didn't have any official business, she just wanted him in the Leaf so she could make her move. After he got here, Tsunade took him to her office. Shizune had been pouring tea for the two Kage when she felt something hit her on the back of her head and she blacked out. When she woke up, Gaara was butt naked and tied to a chair with thick ropes. He was also gagged, blindfolded, and trembling. There's a possibility he was crying too but I can't remember. Anyway, Naruto was holding Tsunade back with the help of two clones while Sakura was trying to untie Gaara's restraints. Shizune got up and looked around in shock. There were uh…*cough* toys *cough* scattered across Tsunade's desk. Naruto was screaming at Sakura to 'Hurry the hell up!' while struggling with Tsunade. Sakura was yelling back at him that 'Tsunade can tie a hell of a knot!' and then she got pissed off with trying to untie the insane knots and just pulled on them and made them snap. This gave Gaara a serious rope burn. Sakura proceeded to take off the gag and blindfold, gather Gaara's scattered clothes and run like hell while pulling a scared, confused, and very naked Gaara behind her. Naruto held onto Tsunade long enough for Sakura to get Gaara the hell out of there. Naruto and Shizune gave Tsunade an earful from what I heard. Poor Gaara. He's only 16 and has an old woman after him. That's pretty fucked up but still funny," Kiba explained after struggling to keep his chuckles in. Eventually they came out anyway and turned into hearty laughter as he continued to think about the whole thing. Neji couldn't help but join in after imagining that scenario. After they had calmed down, Neji frowned as he thought about something. "Wait a minute, how do know so many details?" he asked. "Naruto, Shizune, and Sakura told everybody. It wasn't intended to be funny but all of us were cracking up by the time they finished," Kiba said as he wiped away tears of laughter. "Oh, I see. Well don't stop there. I want to know what else has gone on. I know that's not it," Neji said impatiently. He really wanted to catch up. He didn't like missing out on things but his training had been important to him. "Ok. Really though, that was the most interesting and crazy things that has happened. The past year has been pretty neutral. You know, training and missions. Stuff like that," Kiba explained. "Sounds rather boring. I guess it's a good thing though. I don't have to worry about adjusting to anything new," Neji said slightly disappointed that nothing interesting had happened but also happy for the same reason. "Yeah, you're right. It's your turn to do the talking, pal. I wanna know just what kind of training you were doing. Come on, 'fess up," Kiba prodded Neji for answers. Neji seemed reluctant but eventually sighed in defeat. "If I can't tell you then I can't tell anybody so I guess you can be the first to see," Neji said as he pulled a scroll out of a secret compartment in the side of his chair. "Well alright. Finally you loosen up. So, what's with the scroll?" Kiba questioned him while eyeing the scroll in Neji's hands. "You'll see but you must promise not to laugh," Neji told him in a serious tone. "Ok I promise. Just get on with it," Kiba mumbled.

Neji spread the scroll out in the middle of the floor, did some hand signs, and then pressed his palm to the middle of the scroll. A poof of white smoke appeared and when it dissipated, the Inuzuka could only stare dumbfounded at what had come out of the scroll. "Is that a…..?" he trailed off and just looked from Neji to the thing and back to Neji again with one eyebrow raised.


	2. Noises From Neji's House

At the Hyuga mansion Hinata and Zayla were in the backyard training together since they had nothing better to do. Hinata was helping Zayla with chakra control and focusing it to extremely specific places in her body such as her fingertips. They had been at it for a few hours and decided to call it a day because they were kind of tired. That endurance training over the past year had really come in handy because they would've been panting, sweaty messes on the ground by this time. They went in for some cool bottles of water and a light snack. They talked for a little while and then figured that they would pay Neji a visit since he had probably used the past couple of hours to rest and get settled in at home. The girls took turns showering to get all the sweat and dirt off of them.

Once they had gotten dressed in fresh clothing, they began the short walk over to Neji's house. Zayla was about to knock but was startled by someone from inside saying "Oh shit. That feels so good." Both girls froze and slowly turned their heads to look at each other wide-eyed. "Was that…," Zayla began. "…Kiba," Hinata answered the unfinished question. "Damn, Neji. I didn't know you could do that with your hands. Oh that's fucking incredible. Move a little lower," Kiba groaned. The two girls standing outside the door had gotten nosebleeds from imagining what could be going on in there. "A little to the….left! Oh, fuck yes! Oh, God!" Kiba yelled. Hinata and Zayla, being yaoi lovers, were having a hard time trying not to pass out from the images running through their heads that were inducing a lot of blood loss. They pinched their noses and ran back to Hinata's to get tissues.

When they came out, they looked over to Neji's and saw Kiba coming out the front door. The duo quickly darted across to some bushes so they could listen in on the conversation without being seen. "That was amazing, dude," Kiba said quietly as he… blushed a little? "Thank you. I could do it for you again just don't tell anyone or else I'll have a line outside my house a mile long," Neji chuckled. "Yeah you got it. My lips are sealed," Kiba assured him as he made a zipping motion across his lips with his hand. "Good. See you later," Neji said as he smirked at his still blushing best friend. "Haha take it easy, man," Kiba waved and then walked off.

Meanwhile in the bushes….."Oh my gosh. Did we really just hear that?" Zayla whispered as she watched Kiba walk away. "Yes! Oh wow. I never knew Kiba swung that way. That just makes him so much hotter. Although, I feel pretty weird knowing he was with Neji," Hinata whispered back as she twiddled her fingers. She had a small crush on her teammate but had never been able to tell him. "Oh yeah, I guess that would be kinda weird for you. He's not my cousin though so it doesn't bother me. The only weird thing would be if you thought that your cousin was hot because of this," Zayla said absent-mindedly. "Of course not! I would never think of him that way!" Hinata said in disgust as she smacked Zayla's arm. "Ouch! Yeah I know I was just saying! Should we tell anyone?" Zayla asked with a mischievous glint in her eye.

* * *

Neji had gotten comfy again in his chair and started watching television. He soon got bored and decided to call his only sane teammate and invite her over.

* * *

_Back in the bushes_

"You know we have to tell someone. I don't even know why you asked," Hinata pretended to scold Zayla. "Yeah yeah, my bad. The only question now is 'Who'?" Zayla said as she began rubbing her imaginary beard (must've picked it up from Kiba lol) and considering the options. "Well we certainly can't tell Tenten," Hinata said randomly. "Tenten? Why not? She actually seems like the perfect one to tell considering that they are teammates," Zayla said, confused. "She's right there," Hinata pointed to the weapons mistress who was making her way past the bushes and over to Neji's house. "Oh, I see. Good thing she didn't come earlier or else she would've had her ear glued to the door listening to them," Zayla giggled at Tenten's inability to control herself when exposed to situations involving even the slightest hint of boy on boy action. "Haha I know right. She doesn't even attempt to hide it," Hinata added just as amused as Zayla. The two went on talking and laughing about Tenten until….

* * *

Neji had been boredly flipping through the channels when a knock came at his door. "Finally she's here," he said as he put his remote down and went over to the door. "Hi there, Neji!" Tenten greeted happily before going in her teammate's house. "Hello, Tenten," Neji replied in a tone that's not actually happy but was considered happy for him. Tenten walked into his living room but stopped abruptly when she laid eyes on the thing sitting in there. "Neji, is that a…?" she turned around and stared at the pale eyed shinobi incredulously while he simply smirked and nodded. "Yes, it is." He answered her unfinished question before beckoning her over to 'it'.

* * *

Hinata and Zayla were still laughing about Tenten when all of a sudden they heard said person scream "No freaking way!" They stopped laughing and ran across the narrow street to eavesdrop outside of Neji's window. He had his blinds and curtains shut so they couldn't peek in and see what was going on. They squatted just below the window and began putting their sharp hearing to work. "Yes, I know it's unbelievable. Just take off your clothes, lay down, and let me demonstrate," they heard Neji say. They then heard Tenten sigh loudly and then say "Ok ok."

The two girls stared at each other open-mouthed. "Just what the hell is going on?" Zayla whispered slowly. Her brain was still trying to process what she had heard. "I…don't know. I didn't know he and Tenten felt that way about each other. Didn't he just…do that with…Kiba?" Hinata whispered back just as slowly while her brain was working overtime. "I don't even know anymore, man. Oh my. This must mean that Neji is….a player!" Zayla whispered dramatically (if possible), pausing for more effect. Both she and Hinata gasped and somewhere in the background there was dramatic music. "Oh no! The world has been flipped upside down! What's real? What isn't? Oooooh." Hinata whimpered pitifully and leaned against her cousin's house letting her butt hit the ground as she slowly slipped out of the squatting position. Zayla was about to express her disbelief as well but was cut off by Tenten moaning. "Oh my fucking gosh that feels soooo fucking good. Neji oh oh right there yes!" she screamed. Zayla fell on her butt right along with Hinata after hearing that. The not so dynamic duo sat up against the wall, motionless and a little scared.

They were brought out of their daze by Neji asking "How does this feel?" Tenten moaned again and replied "Oh that feels even better. Holy shit what was that? Whatever it was do it again!" After a few moments she let out a long string of 'oh my fucking gosh's while Neji was doing who knows what to her. A few minutes later, the moaning stopped and Hinata and Zayla had resumed their eavesdropping positions. They could hear Tenten thanking Neji and telling him how awesome 'that' was. Then the girls heard footsteps coming closer so they made a break for the bushes they were in earlier. They made it behind them just as Neji's front door opened and Tenten stepped out grinning and blushing. The eavesdroppers heard her tell Neji she 'Still couldn't believe it.' He just smirked and told her not to doubt him. The two bid each other farewell and Tenten left his house happier than she had been when she first arrived.

All of this left two kunoichi very confused. Were they missing something? They knew what they had heard and there seemed only one logical explanation. But with both Kiba and Tenten? Within the same hour? They were definitely missing something. They decided to continue spying so they could find out what was going on. "I have an idea! We need more people to help us out. They must be serious people who can calmly handle the shit we just heard," Zayla declared. "But who can we get?" Hinata wondered. "I'll get Sasuke. You get Shino. Meet up behind these bushes in 10 minutes," Zayla instructed. Hinata nodded then the two kunoichi leaped away to get the guys.

7 minutes later, Hinata returned with Shino who couldn't believe what she had just told him and had come to see or…._hear_….for himself. Not long after that Zayla and Sasuke arrived as well. Sasuke believes every word that comes out of Zayla's mouth so he came as soon as she said she needed him. The girls explained everything they had witnessed so far and what they wanted to do. They boys agreed to help out. For now, the four ninja simply say behind the bush waiting to see if Neji would have anymore 'visitors'.

* * *

_A/N: Just wanted to inform you guys about Zayla and Sasuke since I said that he believes **every word** that comes out of her mouth and that's pretty serious.. They are not romantically involved. They don't like each other as anything more than really close friends. They have a crazy ass background so if you want to find out about it then read my other fanfic as mentioned in the first chapter. It's called "Payback: Why you should never prank a ninja!" For the chapters with those two specifically, it's probably around chapters 9-13. When I said their background was crazy, I __**really **__mean crazy. Check it out! _


	3. NejiNaru?

Neji was feeling pretty good at the moment. His training really had paid off. If he still believed in fate and destiny not allowing him to control his own life, he never would've taken the steps to receive the training that he had desperately wanted to partake in. He made a decision to contact the person who had opened his eyes to the truth, none other than Naruto Uzumaki. He called the boisterous shinobi and asked if he would like to hang out. Naruto yelled "You bet I do!" into the phone and made Neji wince. He hung up the phone and went back to flipping through the channels while waiting for Naruto arrive.

* * *

"Do you all sense that?" Hinata asked everyone. "Haha damn right," Sasuke smirked. "Yeah, I do," Zayla said blandly as she waited for the inevitable. "It's hard not to sense such distinct chakra," Shino said just as blandly. As if right on cue, Naruto came strolling by the bushes that concealed the four other shinobi. They had masked their chakra long ago so that neither Neji nor his 'visitors' would sense them. They peeped out through the bushes and watched as Naruto knocked on the door in the form of a silly beat and then entered once Neji invited him in. Once Neji had closed the door, Hinata motioned for everyone to run over to the house. They got over to the window and sat down since the squatting had become painful. "This is when shit starts happening. Right after he lets them in," Zayla whispered to the two guys. They just nodded and went back to listening.

* * *

Naruto was on his way to the living room but stopped suddenly just as Tenten had done about an hour ago. He was so confused that all he could do was stare at the thing completely speechless which was super odd for him. When he finally found his voice, he turned slowly to face Neji. "Neji…if I didn't know any better I'd say that looked like a….uh," he was interrupted by Neji walking up to him and placing a hand on his shoulder and nodding. "That's exactly what it is. It helps me out so much," he said to his bewildered friend "So that's what your training was for?" Naruto asked with one blonde eyebrow raised. "Yes. You'd be amazed by what I can do now," Neji replied.

* * *

Outside, the four 'detectives' sat unmoving beneath the window. "What does that even _mean_?" Sasuke asked aloud to no one in particular. "Just wait. It gets interesting. Well, it did before," Hinata said quietly. "Why don't you show me?" the four teens were startled by Naruto's sudden question. He has a tendency to be sorta loud, ya know. "I'd love to. Practice makes perfect. Just take your clothes off then lie down and we can get started," Neji told him. "What the hell? I didn't know they were…..you know," whispered Sasuke in shock. "Neither did we! This is the third person that has—." "Whoooooa! Neji, where in the hell did you learn how to do that? Fuck! No one's ever done that to me before," Hinata stopped mid-sentence as Naruto' cried of pleasure rang through the air. "Oh, that? I Googled how to do that," Neji replied simply. This caused the four teens outside to burst out laughing. "Heh, I didn't know the ol' Hyuga prodigy used Google. That's good blackmail," Sasuke chuckled. The others snickered at his remark but soon they all became quiet as Naruto started up again. "Oh shit! Yes! Harder, Neji, harder! Oooh God yes! Right fucking there!" he continued. "Wow Neji must really be working him out," Zayla mused with a dumb grin on her face as she dabbed a bit of blood from her nose with a piece of tissue. Sasuke and Shino just stared at her blankly. Well, Sasuke did. Shino's head was turned in her direction but his eyes and most of his face were covered so we don't know what type of face he was giving her. "Fuuuuuuuuck!" Naruto yelled. Zayla and Hinata were swaying dizzily from Naruto's 'sound effects' which caused them to rapidly lose blood.

After hearing that, Sasuke became curious and a tad bit agitated and decided to see just what was going on in there. He got up from his sitting position and walked over to the front door. "Sasuke, what the hell are you doing?! You're going to get us caught!" Zayla hissed. "You said that both Kiba and Tenten have been over here and you heard the same display from them. Naruto is my teammate and best friend so if he and Neji are together then I won't stand for Neji cheating on him. I'll be back in a few minutes," Sasuke said angrily before turning the knob and walking right on in

. Knowing they couldn't stop him, Hinata, Shino, and Zayla just went back to listening intently for the oncoming argument. "Whoa, Neji why is there a…." Sasuke paused. "It's a part of my training. Naruto here has felt what I can do. Would you like to see the results of my training?" they heard Neji ask the Uchiha. "Uh…..sure," he replied. You can believe this dropped a coupled of jaws. "Very well, just take of your clothes. Naruto how are you feeling?" Neji questioned the hyperactive ninja. "That was….fucking amazing. We have to do it again. That was just what I needed," he replied, sounding on the verge of tears. Zayla and Hinata frowned at each other then shrugged. "Excellent. Just go over there and get dressed. Sasuke, you lie down here," Neji instructed.


	4. Can I Watch?

Now, when he said this and no complaint was heard from Sasuke, the two girls outside sat frozen for the third or fourth time today. "Does this mean that he and Sasuke are gonna…?" Hinata began. "Uh huh, I think so," Zayla replied. "Fascinating. I was sure that Sasuke was going to go in and let Neji have it. Well, I guess he is letting him have it…in a way," Shino remarked, thinking out loud. "Hey, can I watch?" they heard Naruto ask. "Sure, why not," Neji replied casually. The three outside just sat there for a moment, silent and in shock. They had just lost a good comrade. What were they going to do now? "Son of a bitch! Neji where in the fuck did you learn THAT! Oh fuck! That feels GREAT!" Sasuke shouted, his voice rising and falling as Neji went to work on him. "Sasuke?" the three eavesdropping shinobi all said at once. "I think I'm just gonna…..lay down over here….for a minute," and with that, Zayla passed out on the ground. "Oh no." Hinata said worriedly. She reached into her weapons pouch and pulled out a food pill. She popped it into Zayla's open mouth and smacked Zayla's face to make her wake up and chew it so she could get her energy back from losing blood. Once Zayla was back in action the three resumed listening yet again. "Oh my gosh! Go back to the right…now go lower….lower….shit! Yes, right there! What is that spot? Yes yes yes FUCK!" Sasuke groaned. "Wow Neji you are seriously talented," commented Naruto. "Thank you. Now watch this," Neji said. Our buddies underneath the window just sat waiting with bated breath. They couldn't see anything of course so they just had to wait nervously for what would happen next. Sasuke's loud "OOOOOOOH!" made them flinch simultaneously.

"I've never heard him make so much noise," Zayla murmured, her eyes wide with fear. "Neither have I and I've known him since we were at the Academy," Hinata added, her eyes just as wide. "Neji must really have something special to make Sasuke act so…..out of character," Shino put in showing no visible signs of distress…well duh. His female companions just nodded in agreement. "I still can't believe that the same Neji we know has done…things….with four different people in the past 3 hours. Something isn't right. I'm going to see about this because our Neji would never do something like this," Hinata snapped uncharacteristically. "Yeah your right. What should we do?" Zayla asked helplessly. "I could send one of my insects in to completely drain his chakra so we can study him to see it he's an imposter," Shino suggested as he watched a beetle crawl on his finger. "No no that's too extreme. I'll just go in and talk to him," Hinata replied. "Are you sure you want to go in there _now_?" Zayla questioned with a raised eyebrow. "Yes. It's now or never. I must stop this now. He's my cousin and this is not something he would do," Hinata replied boldly. "Ok ok do what you have to do but be careful. I don't know what he's swinging around in there but it seems pretty powerful if he got _Sasuke_. We have your back so just yell is you need us," Zayla reassured her. Hinata winced at Zayla's blatant language about Neji then smiled and hugged both her friends then stood up. "If I die…you guys can split up my CD collection between the two of you," she said dramatically before walking to Neji's door. Shino and Zayla leaned on each other and pretending to cry and comfort the other. Hinata just laughed at their antics but then got serious. She took a deep breath then stepped through the door. Zayla whispered 'we love you' just as their friend went in the door. Shino just patted her back and nodded solemnly all while wondering why Neji left his door unlocked if he was going to be 'conducting business' in the living room.

* * *

Hinata closed the door and braced herself for what she would see. She turned around and began speaking. "Neji I need to tal-" she stopped suddenly then gasped. "Neji is that a…" after this she said no more. "Hey, Hinata!" Naruto called out from across the room. "Oh, hello, Hinata. Come on in," Neji said as he smiled at his blushing cousin who stood rooted in her spot with one hand covering her mouth. "Umm, th-that is what you trained f-for?" she managed get out. "Yes. I've already practiced on four people. Would you like to be next?" Neji asked his shy cousin.

Zayla and Shino couldn't believe their ears. "What in the holy hell? That's his freaking cousin! What is he thinking?" Zayla whispered angrily. "Both you and I know that Hinata would never do anything like that. Don't worry about her," Shino comforted her. Right after he finished his sentence they heard Hinata say "I'd love to." Both their jaws dropped and a huge sweat drop formed on the back of Shino's head.

* * *

"Great. Sasuke, I believe we're done. Hinata just step over there and undress then lie down here," said Neji. "Naruto move over so I can sit down," they heard Sasuke say. "Ok, I'm ready." Hinata said. "Just relax now," Neji replied. "Ok what the fuck? I'm gonna –" Zayla was about to jump up and bust the door down but was held back by Shino's strong hands around both of her arms. "Just wait. I know this is extremely wrong on so many levels but we must construct a plan. We can't just go in and beat the crap out of him. As much as I hate to admit it, he'd kick our asses before we even got a chance to attack him. We must be subtle," Shino said calmly before he released the infuriated Zayla. He was just as mad as she was and you could hear it even in the calmness of his voice but of course we can't see his face so we don't know if he's showing it or not. *sigh* "I guess you're right. How should we do this?" Zayla gave in. Shino sat back down and leaned against the wall as his brain began working. "Hmm, let's see. We could-" "Oh wow. That feels amazing. Oh oh fuck!" Hinata swore. Hinata's cursing was normal for Neji, Shino, and Zayla but not to Sasuke and Naruto. The two could be heard snickering. "Hehehe I never knew you had such a potty mouth, Hinata," Naruto giggled immaturely. "Haha you said potty. Wait a minute, we're 16! That's not even funny, dumbass!" Sasuke yelled before a loud 'smack!' was heard. "Ow that hurt, asshole!" Naruto whined. He was about to give Sasuke a piece of his mind when Hinata let out a series of crazy obscenities that made him start snickering again. The same can't be said for the two people listening outside the window…


	5. No More Waiting

"That's it. I'm not waiting anymore. Shino, you get your bug loving ass up and come on. Shit is about to get wild!" Zayla growled as she yanked Shino by his wrist. He didn't protest at all and just let himself be pulled along by the maddened kunoichi. They stood in front of the door and Zayla cracked her knuckles before not so calmly bursting in the door of doom. "Ok just what the fuck is—" she paused mid-rampage as her eyes widened in realization at the sight that lay before her. Shino stood next to her, his eyes were probably wide too but we won't ever know thanks to those wonderful sunglasses. "You mean…..th-this is what you've been d-doing this whole t-time?" Zayla stuttered since her brain had been thoroughly fried.

In front of her, Naruto sat grinning widely at her from the couch. Sasuke sat next to him with a shocked expression since he had forgotten to report back after he had been sent in. Neji was standing over Hinata while he smiled warmly at his dumbfounded best friend and waved hello. Hinata laid on her belly stretched out in the middle of the living room, body covered with a towel with the exception of most of her legs and her shoulders and arms. She was laying on a FREAKING MASSAGE TABLE! Zayla's left eye twitched once she put the pieces together. "HE'S BEEN GIVING MASSAGES! AHAHA!" she cackled insanely while Shino tried to soothe her with calming words. "Well, yes. What did you think I was doing?" Neji asked innocently as he went back to making a chopping motion on a lazy looking Hinata's back with his hands. Zayla couldn't answer, she just stood there trying let everything sink in.

* * *

Once Shino had gotten Zayla settled down, Hinata explained everything to Neji. He laughed for about 5 whole minutes. "Oh wow. I guess I can understand where you got that idea from. You see, my training was specialized massage therapy specifically designed for shinobi. After Gaara injured Lee in the Chunin exams, I used my Byakugan and noticed that Lee's chakra points in his left arm and leg were never the same even after he had been healed. They weren't functioning up to full capacity. Even though he is unable to use ninjutsu and genjutsu, his chakra is still a large part of his Taijutsu techniques. His body was used to a normal flow of chakra in both sides of his body so when he was injured, the amount of chakra on the left side of his body was knocked out of balance. This caused his body to take life energy from the other parts of his body, such as bones and muscles, making him more vulnerable to break his left arm and leg during a fight. Without properly functioning chakra points, your body will eat away at itself trying to sustain that balance and will eventually lead to even the fittest shinobi being reduced to nothing more than skin. No bone, no muscles, just skin. I've never heard of it happening to anyone's entire body but I encountered a shinobi who lost just one of his arms this way. It was just a floppy, shapeless mess hanging from his shoulder. I refused to let that happen to Lee. Tenten broke the bottom portion of her right leg completely in half a couple of years ago but was healed by Tsunade just like Lee, though her chakra points in that leg were damaged quite badly. Tsunade is able to repair on the cellular level. The type of massage I learned helps stimulate the reparation of badly damaged chakra points which is extremely difficult to do since chakra points are unable to heal themselves after a certain amount of damage is inflicted. Being a Hyuga and having naturally excellent chakra control, I am able to release a small, steady flow of chakra from my fingertips as I touch the chakra points a certain way and help them work properly again. The training required me to learn a bit of medical ninjutsu which is why I am able to use healing chakra instead of regular chakra," Neji explained.

The other shinobi just stared at him in awe. "Wow, you did all that just to help your teammates? Man, that is awesome," Naruto complimented. "Yes, that is very considerate," Hinata agreed. "Thank you. It really was worth it. My teammates were the main cause of it but seeing that one shinobi whose arm had deteriorated made me really want to do it. I would never want any of my friends or fellow shinobi to suffer that way so I took steps to prevent it. Oh, yes. I learned a few other types of massages as well. One helps with muscles. Our rigorous training as ninja is tough on our muscles and it can eventually lead to them seizing up completely and preventing any movement. I learned a massage that allows me to loosen muscles internally with my chakra instead of standard massages that only work on the outer part of the muscles. Another type deals with bones, cartilage in particular. We do a lot of punching, kicking, running, and jumping. All of this leads to the eventual wearing away of the cartilage between our joints. That causes severe pain from the bones grinding together due to the loss of cartilage. I can use my chakra to form artificial cartilage by massaging the various joint like elbows, knees, etc. and it never wears away," he finished up, once again wowing his friends.

After he had been asked many questions and Zayla had completely returned to her normal self, Neji offered her a massage since she uses the most types of jutsu out of all of them and her body goes through almost as much as Naruto does when he changes into his two-tailed form which is pretty bad for someone who doesn't have rapid healing powers. "So would you like me to demonstrate for you, Zayla?" he asked happily. "Well since almost everyone else has been through it I guess I can too," she said with a smile. "I'll prepare the table. Just take your clothes off over there and then come lie down," Neji pulled Zayla up off the couch and shoved her away with a grin then went over to spread fresh towels over the massage table. Zayla stumbled in the direction of the screen Neji had pushed her at and went behind it to remove her clothes and then emerged with a huge fluffy towel wrapped around her. She blushed due to her lack of clothes even though she had been to hot springs with everyone in the room and had been in nothing but a towel around them many times before. She laid face down on the massage table and rested her chin on her folded arms. She tensed when she felt Neji's large, calloused hands began to caress and gently squeeze her bare shoulders. The callouses on his palms seemed make everything feel better and she could even feel the chakra being released from his fingertips. She relaxed as he progressed but when he got to a spot towards her upper vertebrae, an intense feeling washed all over her making goose bumps spring up on her skin. "Holy shit Neji. What was that?" she asked as she closed her eyes and indulged in the feeling, meanwhile startling the quartet on the couch who had been deep in a horror movie on Neji's TV. "Hmm….it seems that your 2nd vertebrae has been injured. When my chakra reaches an injured or damaged part of someone's body, it causes them to feel extreme bliss. It seems to induce cursing as well," he chuckled and threw a look in the direction of his previous subjects and then continued to rub the skin covering the damaged bone, making Zayla let loose more quiet moans, groans, and curses. The 4 on the couch seemed oblivious to her sounds and continued watching their movie intently. After Neji had finished working his magic on Zayla, he offered his services to Shino who gladly accepted saying something about his shoulders giving him trouble from holding them in the same position for so long when calling forth his insects. Shino was no exception, he too released many foul words and a few groans as well, thoroughly surprising everyone in the room except Hinata.

It was well into the afternoon when Neji's guests left. Each one thanking him for making them feel better and telling him how they were glad he was back. He told them all goodbye and to keep his training to themselves since he wanted to surprise everyone else too.

* * *

_A/N: Neji's explanation was completely made up by me. None of it is true as far as I know. It was made for the sake of this story and for that reason only. _


	6. Deja Vu

The next day, Neji invited many others over to his house to show them his new skills. Once he had given out massages to the rest of his friends as well as the senseis, he decided to see when Gaara, Kankuro, and Temari would be coming back to the Leaf. Gaara had been delighted to hear from him and said he had to come to the Leaf for some business in a few days and would pay him a visit. Gaara arrived in the Leaf four days later. He was greeted at the gate by his buddy, Naruto.

* * *

By the time Gaara had gotten to the village, most of the people who knew Neji had found out about the training he had completed and thoroughly congratulated him. Actually, the only person who hadn't found out was Tsunade. Why wasn't she told, you ask? Shizune didn't want her to go through 'The Neji Experience" and then try to turn it into _more_ than just a massage. Gross. Neji was thankful for that since he didn't want to suffer the same way Gaara had and he didn't have to worry about her coming over to his house during Gaara's visit.

Naruto escorted the young Kazekage to Neji's house, keeping an eye out for Tsunade as they went. When they got there, Hinata and Zayla, the Voyeurism Duo, were just leaving. They greeted Gaara and Naruto warmly before continuing on their way. Neji welcomed Naruto and Gaara in, talked with them for a while, then Naruto started bragging on Neji and made Gaara want to go through 'The Neji Experience' too. He was the Kazekage after all so he deserved some relaxation just as much as anyone else if not more. He told Neji about how he had fractured one of his ankles a month ago and hadn't been able to focus chakra to his left foot since then. Neji was in the process of working with the ankle and holding back laughter from Gaara's previous cursing fit when Naruto suddenly jumped up from the couch and ran to the front door. He swung it open and looked around outside then turned to Gaara with a frightened look. "Umm, Gaara," he said quietly. Gaara opened his eyes at the sound of his name. "What is it?" he murmured lazily. "Uh….." Naruto seemed to be struggling to find the right words.

Somewhere outside someone was yelling what sounded like "Gaaaaaaarra! I'm coming for you my sweet little Kage!" Gaara's eyes widened. "Is that…oh no," he said fearfully. "Naruto! Tsunade is coming! I don't know how she did it but she found about Gaara being here!" panted Sakura who had just ran up to Neji's open front door. "Tsunade? Oh shit!" Gaara yelled as he began to panic. "Heh heh, no way." Neji chuckled as he stood back watching the scene play out. "Gaara, we have to go NOW! Naruto you know what to do," Sakura told him as she scrambled around trying to find Gaara's clothes and then pulled him off the massage table and out the door. His towel fell off so he was left bare as the day he was born while Sakura ran with him. 'Why am I always the one who's naked?' he thought as he allowed himself to be pulled along. He was in shock from the last traumatic experience with Tsunade and wasn't moving his feet at all so Sakura ended up having to hold him up under her arm like a package while she made a break for it. Naruto had made a few shadow clones and ran towards Tsunade. He and the clones tackled her and held her down once again as Sakura and Gaara escaped in the other direction. The real Naruto pulled out a walkie talkie. "Target acquired, over," he said into it. Sakura's voice came back through it. "That's great. I've managed to get Gaara out of the immediate vicinity and into a secure location, over," she replied and Gaara could be heard screaming in the background. "He's freaking out though," Sakura added in a slightly amused tone. Neji had stood in his doorway watching his friends while eating some popcorn he had pulled out of nowhere. "I'm so glad to be home," he said quietly to himself. He watched Naruto run away from Tsunade who was yelling "That was my Kage, Naruto! He's so young and tender! You know I love kages dammit!" He chuckled a bit then went back inside and closed his door. Kiba emerged from the bushes across the street. Tsunade had knocked him over on her way here and he had hidden in the bushes to avoid her doing it again and had ended up watching the whole scene. He had laughed his ass off watching them all run around. "Talk about Déjà vu," he laughed quietly and then went over to Hinata's like had been trying to do earlier.

* * *

_A/N: I hope you guys enjoyed! I actually didn't get the title for this story until I wrote this chapter lol. Anyway, I'd appreciate it if you guys could let me know if you liked it in the form of a review and/or favorite it. If you didn't like it then the consequences of flames are clearly stated in the first chapter. Please review though, I'm a new author and reviews will make me very happy no matter how short or long they may be. Thanks for reading! :D_


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